Friday 2006!

This is the last Friday of 2006...say goodbye to it now. Take all the rotten friday's of the year and salute them! They will never visit you again. :) Here's hoping we all make 2007 a better one.

Dear Commuters,

Please stop passing atrocious smelling wind in the morning. If you feel you may explode from keeping it in, please walk (don't run) to the nearest lavatory. For dietary purposes, you may want to reconsider your fiber intake...for example it may not be necessary to eat an entire wicker swing set for breakfast. These are just some handy tips that have been passed on to me so I thought I'd pass it along so you'll stop passing. Thank you.

It's Thursday

And my equilibrium is dreadfully off kilter.

Hail! Hail!

All hail the mighty microwave!

An Ode To Our New Office Appliance:

Oh Micro, how you Wave

Lots of money will we Save

You can spin you can turn

So my cash won't be burned

Oh hail dear new microwave

Oh hail!

Little Green Satchel

Last night on the train riding home, a little boy (not more than 9 years old) boarded with an older woman, possibly his grandmother or caretaker. He was wearing a large black puffy ski jacket and was carrying a backpack and a little tiny green drawstring pouch. The woman was wearing a hat and was bundled up and they sat down in the seats on the opposite side of the aisle from me. They were talking and sometimes laughing and seemed to be having a good ol' time. I imagined they just came from seeing a show in the city, or taking a trip to see the Rockefeller Tree. I had my headphones on and so couldn't hear their conversation, but I could see them in the reflection of rhe window. I don't know when it hit me but somehow it didn't seem like an ordinary situation, so I turned down my headphones and tried to hear a little of what the boy was saying. He was so intent on playing with the little green bag, tapping his feet slowly against the edge of the seat. I heard the old woman ask gently how he's feeling, that its okay to talk, because talking is important. I couldn't hear his response but he had his head down as he fiddled with the bag and he looked strangely sad. Then out of his little bag he pulled this padlock. One of those 3-number combination ones that you twist. It seemed odd. Then the old woman said how she would like to decorate a Christmas tree, and asked how he would like to decorate a tree? The tone of her voice made me think perhaps something happened to his parents, maybe he had none. He kept looking over in my direction every so often and it broke my heart to see his little face. Why would he have a padlock, and why would he be carrying it in a little green pouch? Perhaps it was some sort of therapeutic symbol for him. Of course I'll never know what the real story was there. However I couldn't help but feel sad and touched by the little boy and his lock.

Try As You May, You Will Never Break My Dreams

There are those that would try to quell, overtake, and utterly diminish another's dream. What right do you have? What makes you any different than me? You're angry, bitter, and believe the world owes you all its taken away. "How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it. -Marcus Aurelius." How much of another human being will you decide to claw at to make yourself feel better. But of course it doesn't. It only fuels the anger. For that reason, you will never break me. You will never defeat me. I will always be successful, and you can only ever hope that the bitterness you hold will learn to let you go so you can be free. Small people lead small lives. We can all choose to grow, to let go, to move on, to fly. You only hurt yourself when you let the beast within conquer you. For that I feel sorry for you. However my pity for you is meager compared to the determination I have for the life that I want. Therefore, the flaming arrows you hurl so carelessly at me fall short and dead, because the dream that I have will always be an impenetrable wall. I just thought you should know, I'm not the only one with dreams.

"Dream no small dreams for they have no power to move the hearts of men."
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

"If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with success unexpected in common hours."
Henry David Thoreau

"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other."
Abraham Lincoln

"Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan 'Press On' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race."
Calvin Coolidge

"Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to the end, requires some of the same courage which a soldier needs."
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Today's HORRORscope

Sagitarrius Dec. 8, 2006 If you are traveling today, you will be pleasantly surprised at how easy it is.

Was the "easy part" the 45 minute delay, the minus 50 deg. wind chills, or the stampede of people crushing each others bones to get on the transfer at Jamaica?? Cause I'm a little confused. Confucius say: For good hearty laugh, snap open fortune cookie or glance at someone's newspaper to HORRORscope section.



All things considered, I'd rather be in a bathrobe and slippers sipping hot chocolate at home.


p.s. (emphasis on HORROR added for author's own satisfaction)

The Blurred Sun

Last night I had a dream in which I was holding a photograph, an image...much if not exactly like the one you see above. In this dream I was speaking to someone whom I associate with my goals and aspirations (aka my dreams). He looked at the picture and asked me if it was a half moon. I replied "No, it's the sun, but its blurred a bit. You have to put it in focus." In the dream I knew that what I had said meant a lot more than just photographic manipulation. I was telling him to put what's blurred into focus, and I said it to him in regards to his career and dreams. He walked away but I knew what I was saying, and when I woke up it gave me a clear solid message to myself. Which is...Sarah your dreams are blurry, you can see them but not that well, put them in focus. It's very easy to get caught up in the routine that IS life. Weeks go shooting by and you barely notice, before you know it that bill has to get paid again. We struggle, we plan as much as we can, and try to create a life that everyone tells us is the right way to live. I've seen my parents struggle for years with financial burdens. It seems that even though we get older and create families, there is no guarantee of happiness. We're born with dreams that make up the very core of our being. There is something we feel passionate about, called to do, and I've heard so many people tell me "I wanted to be...(insert dream here)...but life takes different turns and well here I am, never thought I'd be here." And I think we can be content in the direction our lives take us, its like learning to love someone we weren't really that attracted to to begin with but you shrug it off and go "but I love them so its all good." Everyone has choices to make and we make the best we can with the information we have at the time. I know for myself though, that I could easily settle for where I am in life, and not put in the effort to really chase the one thing I feel so passionate about. It's the blurred sun, I see it, know it's there, do I keep it blurry or do I put it in focus. The sun is a brilliant object, you can't fully appreciate it if you view it blurred.



See how amazing it is. Its not a manipulated image. What makes it beautiful is that it IS what it IS. There's no tricks. It's the genuine article. This is what it was created to be.

You can't give up the genuine article. You fight for it. You bleed for it. Success doesn't come to the faint of heart. Life involves risks, that's what makes it worth living. I'm not content just to get by. That doesn't mean I'm going o sell all my posessions move into a VW van and become a hippie grazing off the land. It does mean however that I am going to put my dreams in focus. You can't sit around waiting for the dream to find you, you have to build it, plan it, act it. It's too easy to lose sight. No one should live life with their socks at their ankles...pull up yer' socks and make things happen!

Burnt Toast

For my 25th Birthday, "Betty" (haha I could use her real name but I think its funny to keep referring to her as "Betty") bought me a copy of this book. Normally I probably wouldn't have bought this sort of book on my own, but since "Betty" and I have an obsession with Lois & Clark and the fantastic actors who play them, I was ecstatic at the opening of this gift. I proceeded to devour page after page (and no I don't mean I really ate them, what kind of a gift receiver would I be!)...and here I am now to give some insights and thoughts about the message of the book.
Here's a line I've borrowed from Amazon to give you the general point of the book:
the message at the heart of Burnt Toast is that happiness and success are choices that we owe it to ourselves to make.
Landmark birthdays (otherwise known as multiples of 5) for some reason make us pause and contemplate our life and where it is. You think, "wow when I was 10 I thought 25 was ancient! I thought I'd have a house, a family, and be driving around in flying cars!" (hey when I was 10 we really thought that! Blame Back to the Future and the Delorean). As you get older and actually hit 25 you go... "wow this isn't very old at all...who can afford a house when I can barely afford my shirt!...family?! its hard enough to find a date!!...and hell we're never gonna drive flying vehicles! What a crock!" Of course if I were 40 and reading this I'd be going "honey, you ain't seen nothin yet...25 is a mere zygote in the scheme of things!" I agree with that....however, ignorance is bliss until you turn around, are 57 and still live with your parents. Therefore I think its highly necessary to take inventory of where you are in life and where you want to be at any age.
One thing that I appreciate about Burnt Toast (i just wrote Toasty...haha Burnt Toasty! god i need therapy)...is realizing that we're all not very different underneath it all. We all start out with dreams and aspirations in life, then somewhere along the way we start to think we're not good enough, strong enough, or bright enough to achieve all that we want. We settle for the burnt toast, the piece that was left in the oven too long, because we think that's what we deserve. Everyone else can eat the pretty toast, but not us, because we're taught (from various sources) to be self-sacrificing..to belittle ourselves and put everyone else before us, because .....remind me again why we do this? Now you have to understand I'm not saying we need to be greedy little mongers who only think of themselves and no one else. There is a fine line you have to draw. You have to value yourself as a person and realize you are deserving of good things otherwise sacrificing yourself for others has very little meaning. I've seen it so many times growing up...we're taught to put others needs first above our own. Unfortunately most if not all of the time this technique is employed in very unhealthy ways....wherein you keep denying yourself to the complete neglect of yourself. Hopefully we've all learned by now that in order to help someone you really have to help yourself first. Everyone needs an example that they can be strong and independent and hopeful in this life...but it all starts w/yourself. It's like trying to help your neighbor build his house when you have absolutely no experience in building one and you yourself live merely in a tree hammock. He's not going to take you seriously at all! The end result will be awful for both him AND you. This is why we build our house first. To be able to truly have a well built home of our own...and one for our neighbor too. Then you can all go and build houses and make toast that doesn't burn!! Because you'll have millions of dollars in excess from being commissioned by everyone to have you and your neighbor help build their home that you can afford to throw out the burnt toast and buy OODLES of new loaves! (Wow I really ran with that metaphor didn't I hahaha)

Tomorrow's Outlook...

Undeniably true

Self Promotion

For this and MUCH MUCH MORE go visit my other blog...click on the link on the right OR go to http://observationsofthemundane.blogspot.com Tell all your friends!

Don't Get Mad...

Get Glad! ..and throw a few people in it.

Freaky Friday

Maura Tierney, give me your life or give me your hair!!

Today's Good Mood Sponsored by:

There is no one alive who cracks me up more than Ellen Degeneres! Well...except myself really...because I'm a friggin RIOT!! A riot in a big city! Just check out that whole "Game of Life" wit in my last blog...that's talent folks really. Can't match that just anywhere! phhsshsh!

He's No Superman...but

But every time this one messenger comes in (one of the calm, quiet natured, non-degenerate looking ones), he always smiles and says "Good morning beautiful!" It makes me smile.

Does This Mean Something??

I've been dying to play this, and my dad just said he probably threw it out. Looks like I'll have to get a new LIFE! HAR HAR HAR *slaps knee*

And we begin to wonder...

Where have all the men gone?

I'm not talking about the gender, the species, the population...I'm talking about the character. The essence of pure manhood. Not the chivalry, not the act, not the idea...but the true inner quality that makes a man, a MAN.

Theodore Roosevelt said it this way, "We need the iron qualities that go with true manhood. We need the positive virtues of resolution, of courage, of indomitable will, of power to do without shrinking the rough work that must always be done." He was addressing the qualities a nation should embody, and its leaders should possess, but it holds meaning for much more than that. Women have undergone inummerable shifts in this society, and the men have been dragged clear along with them. Gender bombs have exploded and left very little trace evidence that could point to clear and exacting characteristics that each originally posessed. The lines have been blurred. Women are no longer women, and men are no longer men. In womens' quest to find equality with men they've lost the ability to enjoy the difference. It doesn't mean one gender is better than the other it just means that there is a difference, and a purposeful one at that. I don't know about all the women out there but I know that what I admire and seek out in a man are "iron qualities". Courage, indomitable will, someone who is not afraid to do what is right no matter what, strong character, and above all a good heart. Women (no matter what they tell you) want to feel safe and protected. Mind you, we can feel safe and protected within our own right, but its the fact that we have someone who has the desire to protect us firstly and foremost before himself. Lets face it, you don't want to be with someone who shoves you in front of the runaway train so you absorb most of the impact leaving them relatively unscathed. Not even in a friend would you want that! Men are taught in today's society that women want "sensitive" men. NO WE DON'T! Who said that!? If we wanted sensitive men we'd pick women!!! (and some do!) Women are like "hey I don't see a difference anymore between a man and a woman (and the men say the same thing) so naturally they go Heyyyyyyy I just figured out a way to double the playing field to find the love of my life! Score!" As Seinfeld would say, "Not that there's anything wrong with that!" I'm just making a point here, this is not a political commentary, nor a sexual orientation commentary, whatever anyone chooses to make out of their life is their choice, I'm merely just posing a question. I'm just throwing it out there, you can take it, you can throw it back, you can do whatever you want with it. However, this is my observation as I speak with so many of my friends who are single and trying to find "the one".... it all just seems to come back to the curve society is taking. Things that used to hold value no longer have the staying power they once had. Is this progress? Is this what we are headed for? We see what we want to see, and I don't see anyone anymore.

Gesundheit!

I can't be certain, but I think this could be a picture of the man who sneezed continuously from Mineola to Jamaica on the train this morning. Things got ugly when the folks ahead of him started pulling out rain parkas...kind of like the people who sit in the "Splash" zone at an Aquarium tank.

This is your brain...This is your brain with a bright idea...

Any questions?
(This picture is an actual and exact representation of everything that is NOT happening in my brain at this very moment in time...thank you RP VIDEOOOOOO!)

They never tell you how many doors there are

I feel quite discontent with life today. Choices, missed opportunities, regrets seem to plague my mind. What's behind door #2? What would have happened if I took #3? How many more doors will I have to go through after I pick #1? Can't I pick all of them and none of them at the same time? Is there ever going to be someone on the other side of the door? Is it foolish to hope? Is it?

Happy Thanksgiving All!

It's Thanksgiving, if you're a turkey Moo like hell! ;-) Hope its a good one folks.

Bada da da daaaaa...

Actually I'm hating it. Why on earth did I get Mcdonalds for lunch?? McDonalds has the ol' "slide right through you because its not real food and contains no nutritional value whatsoever"...its the burger bomb. And its not like its even CHEAP! 6 BUCKS! What was I thinking?? I could have gotten SOUP! Instead I feel extremely gross now and this Sprite tastes like carbonated Toilet Water...which is probably not too far off! Mark my words...never again shall I enter a Mcdonalds. Pardon me now while I go try to convince my stomach that what it just ate is actually not poison.

Weep with me over the injustice...

I could rent this entire house located in Harrisburg PA for $200 less than I pay on my apartment right now.

OR, for $40 more than I'm paying now I could live in this 2 bedroom home in Carlisle PA.



Where is the justice? Take me off of Long (Shot of Surviving This) Island

I Looked In My Crystal Ball and Saw My Future...

And here it is folks...

I Wish I Could...

Whatever connection I had at home, is now defunct. Looks like I'll be signing up for Cable after all.

The Dangers of Tank Tops

This morning on the subway, a man whom I mistook for a gentleman, let me board ahead of him. "Oh how nice" I thought to myself, delighted that this morning I would not be trampled by the crowd. I stand holding on to the pole and he stands facing me up against the door. He had some shifty eyes so I decided not to look at him and otherwise give him a wrong impression...because let's face it, you look at someone for two seconds and they automatically think you want to jump them and rip their clothes off. Okay maybe that's a little exaggerated but the people I've encountered in mass transit have ridiculously outlandish ego's (not all,but some). So anyway, there is this woman, ehhhh probably 30's, mildly attractive, but she happens to be sitting on the seat right next to the shifty eyes man (who is standing). Unfortunately for her, she has decided to jam herself into a tight pink spandex tank top with a very low cut. She does have a denim jacket over it, however someone in a standing position could very easily look down and think they were looking at Twin Peaks Idaho...and that is exactly what he did. Not only did he do it once...or even with a passing glance. This guy LEANS OVER and STARES straight down like he's scanning the horizons for buried treasure! He does this for the remainder of the trip between 42nd and 51st. At one point she glances down (the self inspection), but adjusts nothing, even though one false move could cause a very unwelcomed introduction to her "friends". Meanwhile Shifty over there is looking like he expects them to come out and WAVE to him. I gave him a quick glare but he didn't seem to really get it. I was mad at him for practically jumping down her shirt, but then I realized...if you dress like that, honestly, what do you expect? She didn't seem to be getting bent out of shape, why should I care? Maybe she didn't realize it, but how can you not, the guy is like hanging over your head. That's his game eh, let the ladies on the subway, then stare at their cleavage. What a gem!! Don't all rush him at once girls!!

You're Not Fooling Anyone...

I know I've addressed this topic before but I feel the need to breach it once more---Hand Washing. The above picture details several different procedures to rid your germs of nasty bacteria you will incur throughout your day, most notably after you use the toilet. Last time I spoke on how I've seen women leave the restroom without so much as even glancing toward the soap dispenser, let alone the faucet. This time I have a new tale to tell...
Yesterday I was in the women's room, in the stall, and there was another woman in the next stall who was "finishing up" as I entered. So I hear her exit the stall, she hits the faucet and walks straight out the door 1 second later. Now mind you there was no dispensing of soap, there was no chug-a-chug-chug of the paper towel dispenser. She FAKE WASHED! And she didn't even do a convincing job of it! Why even bother hitting the faucet if you walk out the door 1.4 seconds later?? Why keep the charade?? Its not like she ran her hands under the water either because there was no wetness on the door handle, and she was dressed too nicely to dry her hands on her clothes. You're not fooling anyone! I know you're a fake washer!! You can't pull the toiletpaper over my eyes lady!! I can only hope that back at her disease ridden desk there is at LEAST a small container of Purell Hand Sanitizer. I have more respect for the person who walks CLEAR out of a bathroom without hitting the faucet...the kind of person that shrugs and goes "ya thats RIGHT, i DONT WASH, ya gotta PROBLEM WITH DAT?" At least they're not keeping up a false appearance, they know they're dirty and they're not afraid to tell the world!!

My Motorola iTunes playlist today...

Elliott Smith - Needle in the Hay


The Reindeer Section - Singer from Snow Patrol (quite good)


One Republic - Apologize is amazing...as is Dreamin' and Tyrant. Mark my words they will become popular very quickly just like The Fray.


Trading Yesterday - Good band, nice vocals and composition, if they find the right main stream channel to plug into they could make it big.


Filter - Take A Picture (this is just good old classic 1990s teenage angst, nice guitar riffs too)


Chevelle - Panic Prone (this will be spinning quite frequently on my player for the next week)... all american boys!

My obsession goes public...

Oops. Well as you know I've been obsessed with Dean Cain as of lately due to my buying and watching Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman. Yesterday we got an order at work for DVD's to be made of this new Scifi flick starring Dean Cain... so for kicks and giggles I made myself and "Betty" (the name has been changed to protect the giddy) copies and then went a step further and printed a rather ridiculous picture (the one you see above) on the DVD. This morning I get a phone call here at work from my coworker out in the Long Island office, he says "hey thanks for dropping off the PO's and those DVD's we needed, but whats this one here...with the picture of the guy on it, it looks like maybe Scifi made it??" In my morning stupor I suppose I had pulled out by accident the DVD I had made for myself and left it there!! HOW TO EXPLAIN WHY DEAN CAIN'S FACE is on this dvd. So of course I assume no responsibility for that one and go "OH!! ohhhhhh thaaaaaaat ha...uhh..ha..that I made for my friend, yeah she's a HUUUUGE DEAN CAIN FAN! WOOPS!" So he laughs and goes "ok, I'll just set that one aside for you then...*snicker snicker*" So I might as well say it now to the world... I'M HAVING DEAN CAIN'S LOVE CHILD!!! Hah (that one's for you "Betty"!)

Our Motto: Trod & Trample!

The New York Subway system is convenient, it gets you from point A to point B relatively quickly, its not always clean it sometimes smells but it continues on in its usefulness. For some reason however it hosts a good percentage of unbelievably rude people. Typically I don't encounter many troubles on it other than the usual rush hour sardine-can stockpile. This morning however everyone and their nephew was in a bad mood. I get on to a somewhat crowded 1 train uptown. As I step on, this woman behind me comes barreling in behind and whatever she was carrying jabs me from behind and continues to shove into me until she passes. No sorry's no "oh pardon me's" no acknowledgement of any kind! She just goes waltzing right on in. Well excuuuuuuuuse ME for being in your path your Majesty!!! Then the man behind her gets on and he steps on me like I'm not even there! People were crashing into me like they couldn't see me and for a brief moment I thought I had died and become a ghost and didn't know it. However the pain coursing through my foot told me that I was indeed alive and well. He then backs into me and stands there for the remainder of the ride. My stop comes up and everyone prepares to disembark. I knew it was going to be bad. The door opens and people from behind start shoving everyone like there was a bloody fire on the train! I am propelling out that door at a rate I was quite displeased with, and this tall dark woman comes vaulting out onto the platform yelling into the air, "what the HELL is your PROBLEM LADY!??" I don't know who was propelling us all ahead at a death defying rate...or why it suddenly felt like a clown car let out... whatever the cause, it left me with a very ill taste in my mouth. I'm sick of crowds. I'm sick of people's armpits. I'm sick of people's crowd mentality. It's like being in Kindergarten minding your own business out on the playground on the slide when some little brat on line behind you shoves you down the slide (ruining your entire experience) and yells "GOOOOoooo!!! NNnnnnnnngggghh!!" (**note the "nnghh" is the sound an obnoxious brat makes when they can't wait their turn and their parents never taught them common courtesy...its also the noise they make when they're constipated).
After riding like a sardine last night on the insanely crowded, insanely delayed LIRR (which took me 2 1/2 hrs to reach my destination) I've about had it with public transportation. Can I retire to the country yet? Can I work at an old school-house and ride a horse to work every day? Please tell me yes.

I didn't do it BUT IF I DID HERE'S HOW!

LOS ANGELES (Nov. 14) - O. J. Simpson, who was acquitted 11 years ago in the 1994 death of his wife, Nicole Brown Simpson, and her friend Ronald L. Goldman has written a book and will appear on television telling “how he would have committed the murders if he were the one responsible,” his publisher and the Fox television network said on Tuesday.

How desperate do you have to be for money to keep putting yourself in the public eye when they all know YOU DID IT... and you're a national joke because you keep saying you DIDNT DO IT. Lets take a walk down memory lane back to 1994 and look at the evidence here...

THE EVIDENCE...

1. The 9-1-1 call and the history of Simpson's violence directed at Nicole Brown.
2. Hair evidence: (1) hairs consistent with that of Simpson found on cap at Bundy residence, (2) hairs consistent with that of Simpson found on Ron Goldman's shirt.

3. Fiber evidence: (1) cotton fibers consistent with the carpet in the Bronco found on glove at Rockingham, (2) fibers consistent with the carpet from the Bronco found on cap at Bundy residence.

4. Blood evidence: (1) killer dropped blood near shoe prints at Bundy, (2) blood dropped at Bundy was of same type as Simpson's (about 0.5% of population would match), (3) Simpson had fresh cuts on left hand on day after murder, (4) blood found in Bronco, (5) blood found in foyer and master bedroom of Simpson home, (5) blood found on Simpson's driveway.

5. Glove evidence: (1) left glove found at Bundy and right glove found at Simpson residence are Aris Light gloves, size XL, (2) Nicole Brown bought pair of Aris Light XL gloves in 1990 at Bloomingdale's, (3) Simpson wore Aris Light gloves from 1990 to June, 1994.

6. Shoe evidence: (1) shoe prints found at Bundy were from a size 12 Bruno Magli shoe, (2) bloody shoe impression on Bronco carpet is consistent with a Magli shoe, (3) Simpson wore a size 12 shoe.

7. Other evidence: (1) flight in Bronco, (2) strange reaction to phone call informing him of Nicole Brown's death, etc.

Lets see... Aris Light XL gloves @ Bloomingdales $120... Kitchen Knife Set @ Sears $98... Criminal Defense Lawyer $$$$$$... Presenting every obvious piece of convicting evidence to the Jury and getting acquitted and getting a book deal 12 years later titled "IF I DID IT"...PRICELESS. For everything else there's Civil Court.

This blows my mind. Hmm..ok OJ you didn't do it, you or the police never found out who did...you maintain your innocence... go on national tv...now you WRITE A BOOK stating how you WOULD HAVE DONE IT!??? Are you freakin kidding me!? WHAT PLANET AM I ON???? WHO IN THEIR RIGHT MIND LOSES THEIR EX-WIFE TO MURDER AND THEN WRITES A BOOK SAYING "oh here's how I WOULD HAVE DONE IT IF IT WERE ME BUT IT WASNT I SWEAR!" if you're really innocent????? If I were his mother I'd be ashamed he ever came out my birth canal. Drop out of the public eye already!! Go into solitude!! Just don't be feeding us all these ridiculous lies.

This is how I feel today

My exoskeleton is showing.

Base to Commander, We've Encountered an Impenetrable Wall! Over!

Human beings are so utterly complex, yet they are also staggeringly simple that it blows my mind. There is one thing I appreciate about young children (and only one! haha j/k), their innocence. Pre-disappointment, pre-revelatory, pre-fort knox. They have very little defense except maybe a pouty face and crossed arms when they don't like something. If you ask them what is on their mind, they tell you. Simple. Then somewhere along the line they grow up, they get hurt, they stop trusting that everyone has their best interests at heart and up go the defenses. It happens to everyone, some of us more than others. There is no escaping the Fort-Knox syndrome.
I often wonder what will happen to a person who keeps their walls up continuously. Its a very draining process to keep up that kind of defense. I say that because I did it for quite a long time. It's so easy to remain locked into yourself...don't help me, don't try to make me trust you because I can't, I hurt too much to let anyone within 100 yards of me. That type of mentality. I've come quite a ways from that time in my life thankfully. I still experience it every once in awhile but I'd rather just chew a friend's ear off for 10 minutes so I can get it out. People used to warn me continuously...if you keep it all in it will build and build until it destroys you. And that would have been true. I could see myself heading for that. It used to get really annoying too when people kept prodding at me to open up, which would only make me do the complete opposite! But now I see their point. I think I didn't want to open up because I almost liked being able to hold onto my pain. It was the only type of covering I had to hold on to. This is going to be a silly illustration but you know in Beauty and the Beast when the Beast gets his arm clawed by the wolves...he's sitting there licking it and protecting it but meanwhile thats not going to heal it...when Belle goes to dab it to clean it he pulls away from her. Then he realizes he should trust her so he hands her his arm and she pats it and of COURSE it hurts, but it has to hurt first in order for it to heal all the way. Physical wounds need cleaning, and they hurt, but they will continue to fester and become worse if not treated. The same goes for emotional wounds. You can only ignore it for so long until it finds you. Then what do you do? You think its easier to just ignore it, but you can't. If it doesn't express itself one way it will in another way. That is the nature of the beast. The only way to clean up the mess is to get dirty.
Ah reminiscing on the lessons I've learned...some things we have to learn for ourselves, no one can tell us.

The reason I still have hope...

(Dean Cain & Teri Hatcher at her book signing)
Look at how adorable they are! One day my friends, I'll find my very own Dean Cain who will tote around with me and make me smile like that. Hopefully before we're both 40+

Today's OD Sponsored by:

Tea...
Stop me from pouring another cup. Seriously.

Things Could Always Be Worse...

You could have had a firecracker blow up in your butt.

Briton hurt after lighting firecracker in buttocks
Soldier recently back from Iraq injured in celebration of Guy Fawkes Day

Nov 9, 2006
LONDON - A 22-year-old man suffered internal injuries after lighting a small firecracker he had inserted into his buttocks, paramedics said Thursday.

The incident took place Sunday, when Britain celebrated Bonfire Night, traditionally marked with fireworks to celebrate the Guy Fawkes’ gunpowder plot to blow up Parliament in the 17th century.

The man suffered burns and other unspecified internal injuries in the incident in Sunderland, 275 miles north of London.

Katherine Shenton, a spokeswoman for the North East Ambulance Service, said a caller had phoned in that the victim was bleeding after the firecracker exploded.

Several of the man’s friends recorded the incident on a mobile phone. The blurry images show a man bent over with his pants down and a white flash as the firecracker explodes.

The Times newspaper reported the man is a soldier who recently returned from Iraq.

(The moral of this story: Remember Remember the 5th of November when Gary blew off his butt)

And I Thought They Would Last!

That just goes to show you... just because you like to "get it on" and announce to the world how you like to "get it on", doesn't mean you won't eventually get bored and get it off! Look at how GROSS he is!!! UGH!! The two of them make me want to impale myself on one of their vomitous Albums.

Oops, my bad

Never open the contents of a jar you know nothing about ... especially on a Monday.

Oh The Excitement!!

Season 2 is now in my possession and on my screen this very minute!!!

Remember Remember The 5th of November...

Okay I know that the majority of you who have seen this flik see it as a dreadul piece of trash wherein political propaganda has been spread. I on the other hand watched it this afternoon and enjoyed it and would watch it over again...that is after I blow up parliament (JUST KIDDING). Granted yes it did portray a sort of "glorified terrorism"...however if you compare it to Equilibrium (*ahem Miss V!) wherein the government has become corrupt and systems must be questioned and dictatorships taken down, there is a certain element of truth that should be recognized. What happens when the systems we've created become the unalterable opposing force, therein becoming the very thing we set out to eliminate from the world. I don't agree necessarily with the tactics of "V" in this film and I would never recommend it, but you can see how quickly and easily things that should have been meant for good can turn around so quickly to evil. The film itself was based rather loosely around November the 5th 1605, when a Catholic plot to overthrow the British parliament was foiled....otherwise known as "Guy Fawkes Night." Guy Fawkes is basically "V" in a loosely based Hollywood Wachowski brother's way. Once I realized that this whole plot of the script was actually based on an old story from 1605 I found it all the more interesting and now want to find out more about this Guy Fawkes. So far I have found this reference... "Penny for the Guy." This is a reference to a children's custom in England around November 5th ("Guy Fawkes day") when children make a Guy Fawkes mannequin to be burned on the bonfire in the evening and ask for money in the meantime with which to buy fireworks. What a happy thing to teach children. Anyway as far as the political message of the film its just interesting to think what would happen and how a government could fall into such a Totalitarian rule.
The main message I was able to pull from this film however... (this sounds like i'm writing a paper for class)... was the idea of inner strength and hope. I followed Natalie Portman's character quite closely as I suppose there was something in her character that felt vulnerable and relatable (not to mention I loved her hair...when she had it! give me your hair!!) Every time she would talk to someone connected to the "resistance" they were never afraid of the consequences. The one constant question she would ask was "what if they catch you". Her character goes through quite a metamorphosis from being this scared little girl who is lost and on her own to finding an irreversible strength inside herself. She is tortured, and inside her cell she finds a letter from another inmate who came before, this one little shred of hope gives her some amount of strength to continue on. "Ideas are bulletproof," as I suppose Hope is... we can't survive without Hope, it is the force that drives us to face another day, the compelling idea that tomorrow holds something better. The human spirit is an amazing work of art...it can be crushed, betrayed, both uplifted and drowned, and yet there is an internal switch that never quite gets turned off. It's the tear in the cloud that shows the silver lining. There will always be that small glimmer of Hope to cling to, because that is the makeup of the unconquerable human spirit.

James Blunt Says...

GOODBYE MY LOVAH! GOODBYE BORED SOUL!
R.I.P. "Candy" Oct 2006-Nov. 2,2006.

Obituary:
Candy lived a happy month on Sarah's blog. Venting frustrations, heartache, and ill wishes. He/She a HESHE or a SHEHE, a Mimbo, a Bimbo, a life in Limbo, will forever remain on our thoughts, prayers and blocked person's list. Candy is survived by Sugar and Spice, and nothing quite nice, because that's what little jerkoffs are made of.

Please mourn this wonderful loss with me and leave your own special memory of Candy below. Thank you. Donations can be made to the National Fectus League yo!

Ms. Toilet Says:

It's a simple mechanism. A device. A necessity. It is THE HANDLE. It is what fulfills and completes the toilet's mission in life: the removal and elimination of wastes! It is not meant to be ignored, toyed with, or taken lightly. ONE SHOULD NEVER KID about such serious matters!! It is the BACKBONE of the toilet. Without it, the toilet becomes nothing more than a common object! There are three things that I take very seriously in life... 1) Death, 2) Taxes, and 3) Bathrooms. There are things that go on in bathrooms that I just don't want to know about! I don't want to know what dropped where or why it smells in there, I just want to get in and get out as fast as I can from the bacterial wasteland! I will ignore the splash marks on the door and not even pause a second to discover HOW and WHY it landed there! I'm not as accomplished in escaping quickly as other professionals might be, such as the girls I shared a floor with my first year at College. No no...they were the "Speed Dumping" queens. They could get in there and drop it faster than you could blink. There was one stall...the Handicapped one to be exact, in which was named and labeled the "Speed Dumping Station". It was for those with masterful speed. They were the ones that got to enjoy the spacious luxury of the toilet stalls. But once again...I digress.
Earlier I walked into the ladies room here at work. Many women from all over this building come to this bathroom. All the easier to not have the finger of blame pointed at you....get lost in the crowd. Well my friends, it's been said to me that the cleanest toilet is the one closest to the door...which is probably correct and I would have used it had it been available to me, but I went for the one furthest from the door (in all theories, the dirtiest)...well that theory was correct. I opened up that door and saw something that cannot be described in words. Give me a moment....I'm still trying to recover. My mind could not comprehend this act of indecency! What, did they think they were leaving me a GIFT?! "Look what I did for you!!" Like when your cat brings you a mangled bird half digested and goes "Aren't you proud of me! Look what I brought you!" NO! MY GOD NO! IM NOT PROUD! GET IT THE HELL OUT OF MY SIGHT! Normally I would quick flush it with my foot but I wasn't about to go anywhere near that creature and have it come alive and pull me in with it!! But really folks...how can you do all that, #1 AND #2...with no visible signs of toilet paper anywhere and just LEAVE IT for the helpless victim who should happen upon it. Aren't you embarassed??? Aren't you saying to yourself "hmm maybe the next toilet user doesnt WANT to see my bodily excretions!!" What is going on in your HEAD!? Whatever it is its nothing compared to what is going on in your digestive system lady!!!

Whew...what a relief!

My Personality

Neuroticism	1
Extraversion	93
Openness To Experience	66
Agreeableness	68
Conscientiousness	66

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Though it is surprising I'm that extroverted!

Eroding Eyeballs

See that line shooting into the eye...that's the laserbeam that has been invisibly shooting through my cornea today. Make it stop.